By now you’ve packed your hospital bag, the baby’s room is as ready as it’s going to get, and your aches and pains are robbing you of sleep. Baby’s pressure on your body makes it a struggle just to get up and go to the bathroom in the night.
Face it, this is not an easy time. Even when you’re awake, it’s hard to stay in one position for very long. While you’re suffering through this final stage of being enceinte, it can be very tempting to beg your doctor to induce you, to find your own home remedy, or to agree to an elective cesarean section.
None of these options are optimal you or your baby. Chemical induction or an elective c-section, one that isn’t performed for a serious medical reason, could cause your baby to be delivered before he’s ready, making him more vulnerable to lung problems and could land him in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU). A c-section is abdominal surgery, which will also expose you to a greater risk of infection, problems with your placenta in subsequent pregnancies, and will almost certainly commit you to having this same surgical procedure for any babies you have after this one.
Some parents are tempted to try castor oil or an herbal remedy to jump start labor. Neither of these choices are very wise. Castor oil causes severe diarrhea, and may make you vomit. If it actually works, you’ll not only have to deal with the pain of labor, but you’ll have to experience it on the toilet with your head in a sick bucket. Herbal labor inducers have not been medically proven to be safe for mom or baby, and in some instances they can interfere with medications or affect your baby after birth.
No matter what you may read on the Internet, or what others urge you today, unless you or your baby’s health is really threatened, waiting until your body goes into labor naturally is the truly the healthiest and safest option!
Before you get too antsy and try to jump start your labor, keep in mind that most first-time babies often run late, and that’s perfectly normal. Your healthcare provider will start to become concerned when your baby doesn’t arrive 10 to 14 days after your due date.
Just when you master diapering and dressing a squirming baby, your toddler will take things to a whole new level: standing up, taking off what you just put on, or turning the whole getting-dressed thing into a game of naked tag. It’s aggravating, but the upside is that it means your child is definitely feeling motivated to be independent. The drive is there, all that’s missing is the coordination (and sometimes the cooperation!)
Your toddler doesn’t need a huge wardrobe to get by, just a handful of mix and match items that are comfortable, washable and fit well. Choose stretchy fabrics that allow for lots of movement without binding and will be easy for him to put on and take off. Go for shirts or dresses with snaps or button-necks in the front or on the shoulders, and steer clear of turtlenecks and tiny fasteners.
Roomy overalls that snap open at the crotch and have adjustable, wide straps are great for diaper wearers since they don’t bind in the waist and can work for multiple seasons. When it’s potty training time, select pants that that will stay up without constricting your toddler’s pudgy little belly.
Instead of pants with snaps and zippers, think pint-sized yoga pants or sweatpants with stretchy waistbands, especially when it’s potty training time. Don’t buy sizes that are too large. Even if you roll up the cuffs, too-long legs have a way of becoming unrolled and getting underfoot, causing tripping.
Thick, colored leggings and bloomers will let your little girl to wear cute dresses while protecting her legs and bottom — plus, you won’t have to spend time hunting down matching socks. Bright colors and patterns for toddler clothes are fun, but if you want your child’s clothes to coordinate keep in mind that the more neutral the colors and patterns, the less effort it will take to pull outfits together in a hurry.
When it comes to communicating effectively with your toddler, it helps to understand that his mental world is much different than that yours. Wonderfully, his communication skills and willingness to cooperate will naturally make huge improvements the closer he gets to his third birthday, but until then, here are some hints for managing your little “The Young and the Restless” star:
Be realistic. Rather than inundating your toddler with too many changes all at once, choose just one skill to work on at a time. Expect a learning curve, a “one-step-forward, two-steps-backward” progression for learning new skills.
Move in close. Come in close, and touch him on shoulder when what you’ve got to say is important.
Speak his name. No other word has quite the pulling strength of his own name for getting his attention.
Get face time. He may not understand the command “Listen to me!” Try squatting down and asking him to look at you, instead: (With gestures) “Look at my eyes.”
Speak softly. Your toddler’s hearing is likely superior to yours. No need to yell: A low, calm voice, almost a whisper, will do.
Keep it short and simple. Use the most concrete and fewest words for making your point: “Here’s what I want you to try. Can you do this? Model what you want: “Watch me.” Invite him to join in: “Now you try it.
Make it fun. When delivering a lesson, convey enthusiasm as though you are presenting an exciting new game, and he’ll likely go for the bait.
Back down. If he appears uninterested, distracted, or doesn’t respond when you’re trying to teach him something, don’t be tempted to lock horns. Just back away and try again later.
Time it right. Keep an eye on his energy curve. The best time to try new things is when he’s most likely to be cooperative, alert, and playful. Cut slack during the hours you know he’s most likely to be fretful, tired, irritable, or hungry.
Make directions positive. Rather than always telling him NOT to do things, express the behaviors you’re hoping for as simple, positive commands: “Walk slowly.” “Zip lips.” “Sit here.
Don’t “overparent.” Rather than showering him with effusive praise or interrupting him when he is trying to concentrate, simply sit back, relax and observe what he’s doing, and then describe what you’re seeing when there’s a pause. “You’re helping Mommy put the toys away, aren’t you?” He can handle that.
Help with transitions. Don’t upset him by abruptly shifting from one activity to another. Instead, prepare him first with a gentle warning: “You can play for 5 more minutes, but then we going inside for lunch.” Then: “Okay, it’s time to go inside.” Or offer him two simple options that make him feel he’s got some decision power: “Do you want to go inside now, or in 5 minutes?”
We get lots of questions from moms on HappyHealthyPregnancy.com about when they can expect to feel their babies’ movement the first time. It’s usually around the 20th week of pregnancy, although experienced moms usually detect it sooner. Heavyweight moms and those whose babies have implanted themselves on the front of their uterus (uteri?) may take longer to feel their babies’ kicks, since the motions have to be sensed through both the uterus lining and the abdominal wall. The word “kicking” is actually a misnomer. Babies are very active during pregnancy, and what moms are actually detecting are flails, wiggles, twitches, arches and thrashes — spontaneous movements — since the baby is living in such tight quarters that he can’t fully stretch out his legs. Baby “body torque” actually starts as early as 6 weeks of pregnancy the instant they get their primitive muscles and wiring. After that, they spend a huge amount of time moving. Once their fingers are fully formed, they make fists, and even suck their thumbs! About 2/3rds of baby hand movements before birth are directed toward their mothers’ bodies, their umbilical cords, feeling the uterine wall, and their own faces and bodies. No wonder being swaddled after birth is calming and reminds them of being back “home”!
So there’s now more evidence that breastfeeding isn’t, as the headline says, “as beneficial as once thought.” It’s starting to sound like the benefits of breastfeeding may have more to do with hormonal factors than with the milk itself. Makes me wonder if the reported reduction in breast and uterine cancers associated with breastfeeding is also related to something else, like lifestyle or hormones.
I was called by the Ed Norris show to comment on this story, and when I began to look into the facts it turns out that the reporter, Cheryl Critchley, completely misrepresented what the study said. “Reports” the Herald Tribune,
The Christian Calvin College in Michigan quizzed 2600 teens and found the 75 per cent who were smacked at ages 2-6 performed better on measures such as academic and volunteer work, college aspirations, hope and confidence than those who weren’t.
In reality, everything in the above paragraph is false, other than the college being in Michigan. The study was of 187 teens, not 2600. The kids were not “quizzed” but self-reported on seven questions, including if they had ever “attacked anyone,” been “depressed” and if they felt they had a “close relationship with God.” Teens who had been hit did not perform “better,” in truth there was no significant difference in how they responded. Below is the PowerPoint that the researcher, Marji Gunnoe, sent me.
For the record, numerous studies have found associations between negative consequences and hitting kids, from lowered IQ’s to higher rates of criminal behavior and sexual deviance. But note than an association is not the same as cause-and-effect, which is pretty much impossible to establish if you’re using real humans as subjects. The bottom line (har!) if you’re looking for scientific support for the benefits of spanking: it doesn’t exist. But if you’re looking for evidence that certain people are trying to turn spanking into a political issue, there’s ample evidence for that!
“The Case Against Breastfeeding” from The Atlanticis a lot of food for thought (har!). I do think that the pros of breastfeeding have been overstated, especially by interest groups like La Leche League, and though the research I’ve read about childhood obesity and breastfeeding has all sounded pretty conclusive, it is hard to create a perfect study when you’re using real-life human infants as subjects. In America, formula-feeding, poverty and education are all so closely correlated, it’s nearly impossible to isolate the effects of each.
My baby doesn’t like the bottle. I want to pump and give her the bottle since she is 5 months old and teething right now. Do you have any suggestions?
If you’ve been exclusively breastfeeding for the first five months, it might take your daughter a few days to get the hang of the whole bottle thing, because babies need to use different mouth motions to get milk from a bottle. Here are some tips: first, plan to introduce the bottle a little bit earlier than your baby’s usual feeding time, so she’s hungry but not so ravenous that she’ll get frustrated and frantic if she can’t get the hang of the bottle right away. Then, have someone else offer her the bottle for the first few feedings, preferably when you’re out of the house. Babies can smell mom’s milk from 20 feet away, and that can distract and confuse them. So hand your baby and a bottle of pumped milk to your partner or a sitter, and run an errand or take a walk! If your baby still rejects the bottle after a few tries, try experimenting with different nipple styles and shapes—your baby may prefer latex over silicone, or have an easier time with an orthodontic shape.
Pregnancy really does make women more sensitive to certain flavors and odors. One really interesting study asked a group of women– some not pregnant and others in different stages of pregnancy– to rate the intensity and their preferences of salty, sweet, citric and bitter flavors. While the women who weren’t pregnant varied a lot in how intense they thought the various flavors were and how much they liked them, pregnant women in the first trimester were united in ranking the bitter and salty flavors as more intense and less appealing. And, the farther along the pregnant women were, the more they liked the salty and citric flavors, and the less intense they found the bitter flavor.
Researchers theorized that pickiness peaks in the first trimester to help protect the fetus from poisons at the most sensitive stage of development, then preferences change to encourage a balanced diet closer to delivery. Pretty interesting!
Researching toddler tooth care today! According to the AAPD, crackers are actually worse for children’s teeth than caramels! The starches in crackers are just as harmful to teeth as the sugars in caramels, but the sugars in caramels actually dissolve more quickly. Also surprised to learn that the bacteria that cause tooth decay can be spread by sharing utensils.
This site is not intended as a substitute for professional medical care. Visitors to this site should regularly consult a physician for all health-related problems and routine care during pregnancy, after birth, and for their children.
